Monday, March 17, 2014

I'm baaaaaaaack!

Hello, old friends! Have you missed me? That's right, I'm back! This time, I'm in Thailand, looking for a job teaching English...or any job for that matter. So, let me catch you up...
When last we spoke, I was living with Norm hoping to save money to get back to Thailand to earn my TESOL certification to teach English as a second language. Norm and I were planning to work out a situation where I could be gone for a few months each year, and he was planning on getting a passport.
Then, real life set in. I went through a series of crappy minimum wage jobs, making it impossible to save money, and the lack of money gave way to my dependency on Norm, which in turn gave way to us being at each other's throats. We fought constantly, and I felt stuck. I suppose he did to, because over a year later, I still lived there even though I really didn't want to and he was still letting me, even though he clearly didn't want to. The hate in that house was overwhelming, and all the shiny happiness and optimism I'd brought home with me had been replaced with depression and anxiety. At least, I had managed to get my TESOL certificate early in the year, but it was just wasting away in an envelope in the corner of our room. Ironically, on the last day of the course, Kathy the instructor went around the room, asking us each a personal question, and the question she asked me was, "Sandi, what will you do if things don't work out the way you'd planned?"
Thankfully, as I may have mentioned before, I have the two best grandmothers a girl could ever ask for. The grandmas took pity on me and for Christmas/birthday, they decided to give me just enough money to purchase a plane ticket and sustain me for at least a couple of months while I look for work in Thailand. I can't thank them enough...but I will keep trying!
So here I am, back in Thailand, for nearly a month now. It's definitely not as easy as I'd hoped it would be. I think I can hear that damn question from Kathy in my head every night as I try to sleep. Frankly, nothing ever works out as planned, but it still always seems to work out.
I am currently sending out resumes at least twice a week, and I've gotten a few responses to set up an interview, but no actual interviews yet. I have also decided to send my resume out to China...just in case. China is my backup plan, as there is no money or home to go home to, so giving up is NOT an option. See, China offers more than Thailand anyway: reimbursement of flight cost, free apartment, and about $2000 a month. Also, I can Skype interview for positions in China, something Thailand doesn't really do, so I could have a job and an apartment all set up before getting there. I can hear all my lovely little fans wondering, "Well, why the heck didn't she just go to China in the first place?" American life took a toll on my confidence and also, added a bit of fear. I am super nervous about being a teacher. 120 hours doesn't really feel like enough training, especially when you consider that you'd need at least 4 years of college to do the same thing in America. I wanted to learn to teach somewhere that I at least didn't also need to acclimate to a new country and culture, as well. But now, being here and remembering how this all started and how new it was then and realizing how much I love it all now, somehow makes China seem more "do-able." The goal was never to travel to teach, the goal was to teach to travel. I had planned to go to China next year anyway (and somewhere new each year after), so there shouldn't be anything holding me back from doing it now.
So stay tuned, fans, there is definitely more to come! I will keep you updated, and I promise to post pictures of my adventures as well. Send me happy thoughts and job vibes until then.
P.S. I missed you, too.